"How shit you must be if I got you out twice!"
-Paul Harris to Andrew Symonds, Perth 2008

Thursday, October 1, 2009

Broad down, none to go

Nobody realized that every player I dislike has been injured during the course of the Champions Trophy. I tried to give hints. I said it on KK's site. I even put up a complete list of injuries (before Clarke, Ryder and Broad) and people still didn't put it together.

Go read the comments section. I admitted to injuring Yuvraj and said Ryder was next on the list. Who was the next to go? Ryder. Then KK asked me to injure Broad.

Who has been injured now?

Stuart Broad. More specifically, Stuart Broad's left buttocks. I did it for my friends. I am loyal like that.

Although I must admit that I was not looking to injure that particular area. I was just chasing him with a knife,wearing a mask. He tripped over Tim Bresnan and Graeme Swann, doing something naughty in the dark, and landed on top of Jimmy. Who bit him, thinking he was a tall box of golden, crispy fries. That tightness that he is complaining about, it's Jimmy's plaques. They tend to hold on like bitches.

Still don't believe me? Here:

No need to thank me.I know, you are "tushed". I can't blame you. I am a lovely person after all.


Anonymous said...

That is pretty impressive Purna. Now that I think about it, it all makes sense.

Ryder and Broad, who would have thought. You cunning thing, I'm going to be giving you an injury wish-list soon.

Purna said...

Sure. Give me any wish-list. I am quite enjoying this role of a dark and twisted fairy godmother :D.

The Cricket Corollary said...

LOL, nice going P, why don't you add some Aussies on the list?

Purna said...

Like who? Hussey?

Es and Sid, can I please injure him? PLEASE!

Not before the English are thrown out though :D.

missjane said...

I just had to say *please* don't injure Hussey, when he's finally remembered how to play again!

And, Purna, work has been ridiklusly busy so haven't had time to comment much, but have really been enjoying your posts and had a good laugh at them now and then! Nice work :)

Aditya said...

Please injure ricky ponting . I wonder who will be australia's captain with clarke injured...anyone is a better captain than him!

loosing two ashes in england! what a disgrace to the aussie team!!

Purna said...

MissJane, thank you for your kind comments :). Now I can't injure Hussey anymore! Sigh. Fine, I'll leave him alone.

Adi, Simon Katich,Brad Haddin or Cameron White. I'm not even joking. Hads and White are being considered for the T20 captaincy!
Ricky was completely outplayed in 2005, but I don't know if 2009 was his fault. He did make some unimaginative decisions, but his team really, really let him down!

I am scared to injure him...he might attack me with his storage of bubble gum!

Aditya said...

he isnt a good captain! not even half as good as waugh was ! so I want him out :)

yes i'm aware of the t20 captaincy issue hoping white gets it but those selectors will go with clarke ! :|

Purna said...

He isn't a good captain. But the future prospects are worse. Can you imagine Clarke leading the Aussies in the Ashes? They will be crying for Ponting then!