How did they lose?

MTJAG has a great post up about the 5th ODI and the consequences of being Sachin Tendulkar. A similar discussion can be seen all over the blog world about why India lost to the most inferior Australian side in years. So I'm proposing a few answers. Most of them are debatable.

1. It's the curse of having a Sachin Tendulkar in your team. There is no one like him, there possibly will never be. When you have a Tendulkar in your team and he is at the crease playing one of the best innings of his life (there are so many of these!), do you ever think you will lose? When Sachin goes out, because believe it or not, it can happen, instead of taking responsibility, the others panic. Then they lose and everybody blames Sachin for not finishing the game. Last time I checked, the team was called India, not Tendulkar. And cricket traditionally tends to have 11 men teams. Now, if Sachin had 10 kids and they all played for India, it would be different.

2. The Indian bowlers gave away 350 runs. You know your opponent team's bowling attack is weaker than your grandma's knees and you know the batsmen are going to come after you to make up for that. So clearly, the obvious answer is to allow their top order to make 350 runs. All at strike rates of hundred and above. And please don't start all that batting pitch nonsense. 10 Indian batsmen combined made 155 runs...and 17 out of India's 347 came from the Aussie bowlers.

3. Ravindra Jadeja wanted to be a hero. As did Harbajan, with that stupid shot which got him caught behind, but Jadeja took it to the next level. The minute Sachin got out, he started itching like a man having withdrawal symptoms. He was so upset with the Aussies for not being able to run him out that he let them have a go again and again. Did anybody catch Praveen Kumar's face when the Aussies finally did get him? I crossed my fingers so tight for Praveen to go up and slap him that they were nearly drained of blood. Alas, Harbajan hasn't taught Praveen the correct way to deal with eager youngsters yet.

4. This is Australia. Taken from Ricky Ponting's facebook fan page:

"Plenty of press about India attacking us today because we are wounded with all our injuries! That's just the way I like to go into a game with a bunch of guys like we have. India can't afford to be off their game at all as we will be on the attack right from the opening ball today."

As much as I hate to admit it (man, why do I have to be so sensible sometimes?), you just don't piss off Australia and get away with it. Even if they have put together a team straight from Cricket Australia's day care. When Australian cricketers are made, they are injected with a fluid that runs through their blood yelling 'I don't know the meaning of giving up even if I am shit. I don't like losing at all. And fuck you for thinking otherwise'.

I opened up an Aussie cricketer once to meet this bugger. Tough little sneaky bastards. That's what the Aussies are made of. Unfortunately.

My Dad the Comedian

My father is an Indian supporter. It would have been unfortunate expect for the never-ending hilarious rivalries we have, whenever India play South Africa. He is also wonderfully adept at making fun of the Blues when they are terrible. He has been out of the loop with cricket for a while, thanks to the North American lifestyle and the terrible cricket coverage. Thus, he was delighted to see the first India vs Australia game on TV and sat down to watch like an eager school boy. Till Ravindra Jadeja started bowling.

Dad: He is a spinner? Why isn't the ball spinning then? Has cricket evolved to the point where a spinner doesn't need to make the ball to spin anymore? He can't even spin the ball on an Indian pitch! He is bowling again! Why is he bowling again?

Me: Probably because Dhoni loves him.

Dad: Who is Dhoni?

Me: The Indian Captain.

Dad: Why?

I didn't know why Dhoni was the captain. So I started laughing, trying to explain to him that Dhoni actually had a good record. To which he replied,

Dad: So his record is going to win him this match? How lovely! Another flat ball! This Jadeja guy really is a true 'mystery spinner'!

Then the misfields started and his rants just kept on getting better.

Dad: All the fielders are lying flat on the ground but the ball still makes it to the boundary. I think the Indians don't realize that there is a reason people dive when the ball is racing. No one told them that diving after the ball has already passed is of no use. Know what Kumble used to do? He would make heroic dives with his legs wide apart, so the ball could continue to roll on through the gap. It was quite a show. But he had done his part, he dived!

I just had to find a picture of this.


It's not the ideal picture but his legs are far apart and the ball seems to have evaded him. I laughed so hard. These are times when I have no qualms in admitting that my father is always right!