"How shit you must be if I got you out twice!"
-Paul Harris to Andrew Symonds, Perth 2008

Monday, November 30, 2009

Blame Biff

You knew it was coming, the part where I blame Graeme Smith for a Proteas loss. It's extremely satisfying since the Captain gets blamed for all sorts of things anyway. The bowlers were shit, blame the captain. The batsmen collapsed, blame the captain. The player showed up drunk at the game...oh yes, blame the captain!

So here I am blaming the captain, or rather revealing to you all why the Saffers REALLY lost. I have incriminating evidence against Graeme: he never got picked for soccer as he was such a buffalo, so now he is taking it out on South Africa by making shit calls and playing like crap.



What the hell is he saying at the end? Contact who, regarding what? Speak slowly Biffy. S-L-O-W. You know, like the way your brain runs.

4 comments:

straight point said...

before the series smith said something of this sort...

when england will come we will be 'hot'...

perhaps he forgot to add... 'to be served...'

Purna said...

Sp, you are such a comedian! I propose you write all of Graeme's speeches for him.

Jawad said...

See the thing about Smith and...well Arthur too, is that they just like to talk ALOT. Smith seemed to have turned his ego down a bit and his mouth too, which helped them during the Australian series. They kept their heads down and did their thing. It is when they start barking alot of bullshit and never back it up with a good performance. SA does not need a new captain, I think they need a SHRINK. A real good one too, some one at university level.

Purna said...

They have Jeremy Snape, but evidently he doesn't know how to shut them up. I would give them some good quality tape.