"How shit you must be if I got you out twice!"
-Paul Harris to Andrew Symonds, Perth 2008

Thursday, January 7, 2010

T3D5: FML.com

Today, I perved on Dale Steyn publicly on National T.V. Steyn has a girlfriend. FML.
-Submitted by Geoffrey Boycott

Today, I intentionally got caught by Ashy P but had to pretend to be sad in front of my fucktard captain who makes me do it all. FML.
-Submitted by Jimmy Anderson

Today, Bumble called me a good captain for putting Ashy P in a wicket-taking position. The idea had come from Boucher. FML.
-Submitted my Graeme Smith

Today, my good mate knocked me up. He uprooted my off stump. FML.
-Submitted by Jonathan Trott

Today, I scored a match saving 78 then got out at a most crucial time. Most people will remember how I got out. FML.
-Submitted by Ian Bell

Today, I defended 22 deliveries without scoring a run and then lost my wicket to the man who can't turn the ball. I was sure I was not out, then again in my mind I am never out. The umpire didn't think so. FML.
-Submitted by Stuart Broad

Today, I had to run from the toilet straight down the pitch. My captain wanted me to get a breakthrough. I took some magical drink for the second last over. I still didn't get a breakthrough. FML.
-Submitted by Dale Steyn

Today, I wanted Onions for dinner. The bastard didn't want to come home with me.FML.
-Submitted by Morne Morkel

Today, I had to defend my ass off to get my team a draw. I was successful but I am actually a bowler and my role is to pick up wickets. FML.
-Submitted by Graham Onions

Today, I won Man-of-the-Match. My team couldn't get the final wicket for the win.FML.
-Submitted by Graeme Smith

Today, I feel blue. Both my teams lost crucial matches. FML.
-Submitted by Cricket Minded


Aditya said...

England are getting masters at executing these collapses and draws...it would have been better if colly and belly batted thru...but now its an advert for test cricket no one cares how hopelessly england collapse !

this is the 5th tense draw in an year for england ( 2 with the WI giving it to them) and now!

Purna said...

I don't know if it's England's ability to draw or South Africa's inability to get 20 wickets...

Wes playforcountrynotforself said...

Purna, the latter, the latter :(
Oz used to have this problem too not long ago...

I was sure I was not out, then again in my mind I am never out.

Ahahahahahahahaha orsim *rofl*.

Purna said...

They better fix it before the 4th match then.
England will probably try to draw there again.

Vim said...

Morne is starting to get on my nerves. Has he got MJ's disease? Bowl at the stumps at tail-enders you bloody big twit!

See Broady cutting up his helmet to waste time? How funny he isn't.

For a lad of his age, he is a real piss taker. Even Michael Vaughan now criticises him regularly.

Purna said...

Yeah he and MJ should be put into a room together with a picture of the stump. That last ball that Onions left...I just kept on thinking if only he had aimed at the stumps! Unfortunately, can't hate him too much. He is a slow learner!

Still much better than his brother.

I am not surprised. He is a brat, no one likes him.

Vim said...

Wisden like him. They defend the latest bit of brattishness by their 'golden child' on a weekly basis. They have no idea how unauthoritative they now look as an institution.

Purna said...

I've just realized the ball will swing at Wanderers. Not the best place for the Saffers to draw this series. My troubles continue.

But you know what that means...even Barbie might get a few wickets. Watch out for Wisden then!

Buffalo needs to win the next toss...