That's the headline that Crapinfo used to sum up the game that none of us watched today. Except for maybe the first ball. Here's what happened in a nutshell:
1) Michael Clarke did not play the game because of a sore back. In the pre-match interview, Ricky put it as 'Yeah, Clarke has a sore back from the flight or whatever'. With a name like Pup, I guess we are not surprised that sitting for a long time would be enough to fuck up his twig like body.
2) Hussey scored less than 10. Again. What does he have to do to let Merv know that he can't play cricket anymore?
3) Witchy Mitchy did some hocus pocus on the Windies bowlers, so they allowed him to reach his half-century. He is re-launching his campaign as an all-rounder. You will need some pretty dark magic to make us believe, Mitchy. Voldemort's hotline is 1-800-You-are-a-bad-boy-for-abandoning-your-mother.
4) Brett Lee did not bowl a single no ball. But he got only 8 overs. I am confident that two more and we would have seen at least 5.
5) Even without Chris Gayle and Dwayne Bravo, WI managed to get past 200. What does Australia have to do to prove to the world that they are not good at cricket anymore?