House warming

The reason behind Crashraful's hair tearing form is now clear. He has been planning the biggest career move of his life.

He bought a house. But that's not it. He was planning the perfect house warming, an event where batting legend Sachin Tendulkar and slapmaster Durbhajan Singh were to attend.

Clearly preparing this feast has been the main focus of his mind for the past years. What do you feed Sachin Tendulkar after all? How do you even decorate the house for him?

I would say put lots of pictures of fast bowlers crying. He would like that. And feed him everything in the country of course. I see fish, rice, chicken, beef, water, pepsi...good going Crashraful. You even got the Mumbai Indians to sponsor this dinner.

Look at how upset Durby is about not getting the fish from Crashraful. Chill dude. He probably has Sreesanth as entertainment later. Sreesanth will give you a lap dance.

Hey Sachin, teach him how to use his brain in return okay? The guy went through so much trouble for you, planning this shit for years. Stuff you till you blow up all over the place. What's for dessert Raful? Surely cake in the form of cricket balls.

Raful just enrages me, but if you look at it from a slightly sane perspective that is not such a shabby dinner party. I mean, how cool would it be to have Sachin Tendulkar at your house warming? Even if you are not a fan.

Raful has finally inspired me to do something. When I buy my first house I'm getting Jacques Kallis to cut the ribbon. Think I should have some extra food in the fridge?