The other De Villiers

Once upon a time, not so long ago, a lovey blond name AB de Villiers met a singing sensation called Ampie Du Preez. It was love at first sight. They did not go a day without each other, frolicking along the streets of Pretoria as often as they could. As their bond strengthened AB and Ampie decided to take their relationship to the next level. Now to many, the next level would have been moving in together but AB was obsessed with passing on his freakishly perfect genes. Before long, AB demanded that Ampie have his baby. Ampie was trapped but loved AB too much to do anything about it. So they went about the usual business of baby-making and after one happy day when the stick turned blue, AB and Ampie started their countdown. Very soon, a baby boy arrived.

Cornelius Johannes Du Preez de Villiers.

He took AB's surname because AB is the more famous one of course. But note, the Du Preez is also there. It is irrelevant that he is known by his initials CJ, just like his daddy. After all, love is blind and that is exactly how Ampie saw it.

It is also irrelevant that Cornelius grew up to be a cricketer. His parents introduced him to both music and cricket. But what Ampie did not know was that AB secretly played their 'hit' single to CJ every night till he concluded that if his singing voice was anything like his daddy's, he would be publicly tortured in a square one day. So CJ chose cricket and AB rejoiced, waiting for his baby to become the next start batsman for his country.

Therefore, it came as a huge shock to him when CJ established himself as a bowler by producing two beautiful deliveries that saw the Diamond Eagles through to the second stage of the Champions League. They were dead on, straight and fast. AB was livid with rage! His anger heightened when he saw CJ's Cricinfo profile brand him as "a quick bowler who can also bat a bit". AB was now foaming from the mouth and nearly having an epileptic fit when all of a sudden it all clicked. The timing, the tall lanky looks, the fast bowling, the person that was left out from the squad...

Turns out when AB was busy training for the Proteas, Morne was the one around to console the lonely Ampie Du Preez. And Morne's genes are superior to AB's.

Some say the tricks of fast bowling are passed through the blood line

Showing us who they are

I found this video on Mary Jane's blog, about AB De Villiers. It's in Afrikaans so Brandon has to translate it for me. But from what I saw, AB seems to be shooting a video for 'Show them who you are' with Ampie Du Preez. They are both dressed like Siamese twins in white t-shirts and jeans, standing on top of a rooftop and singing. The situation concerns me. I hope this is a phase that AB is going through. He is easily one of the best cricketers of the new generation and smoking hot, on top of being excellent at everything he does. But this is one department where what he touched did not turn into gold. I don't know how the song has been doing in SA or how many people are actually dying to watch the video, but it is HORRENDOUS! AB sounds like a bathroom singer and the lyrics make you cringe. The video looks equally painful. Even AB's dashing looks will not be able to save this one...unless maybe, you put it on mute. Maybe.

I implore you AB, do not follow Brett Lee and become a joke. We are being subjected to his atrocious singing at the World Cup 2011 opening ceremony, which is taking place in Bangladesh. It's been officially marked in our calendars as Dooms Day. We always knew God would punish us for our bad deeds, but we had never imagined that the our last memory on Earth would be of a blond, Australian fast bowler crooning to the Backstreet Boys.

AB's baby pics, shown later on in the video, do look cute though. The guy was a born heart-breaker. I tried to find some pictures online for your aesthetic pleasure but the search was a failure. So you will have to go through the video to see them. Don't pretend like you won't. You too think he is hot and want to know what AB De Villiers has that you don't. Enjoy!

Thanks MJ!

He got to Sanga too! Lee is a contagious disease!