10 ways to avoid getting dumped

1) Orange screws up all brains, avoid orange at all costs.

2) When she makes a move and comes flying towards you, catch her. Dropping her on the ground will just, I don't know...piss her off and kill her.

3) When the hot mistress is on the bench and your world is spinning, don't go for the idiot (albeit a slightly adorable one) who doesn't do spin. Let the hot mistress in when the time is right.

4) Just because you paid the Australian to screw up and make you look good, doesn't mean that he won't come back and grab your girl.

5) Never trust a girl you stole from your bitter rival.

6) If you must throw her like a dart, at least pretend to be good at dart-throwing.

7) Don't send a dart-throwing gigolo to do a lover's job.

8) When picking your strategy, remember that hard and fast doesn't always work.

9) Having only one asset is an error because once the asset is gone, it is the end.

10) Just because you are in top form most of the time, does not mean she will not ditch you when you screw up. So try not to make a mistake till you have her hundred percent, and even after.