Dale must not play

Dear Anil,

It has come to my attention that South Africa's main weapon, the weapon that recently demolished your nation, the maniac that has done so much for your IPL team is currently struggling with an elbow injury.

(Excuse me, I must got FML)

Okay, I am back. So, Dale Steyn has an injury which is almost reminiscent of last year, when the Poms came and managed a draw and a win before lovely Dale was back in full swing. They may have managed a draw afterwards as well, but that obviously has been selectively removed from memory. Except when the brain perceives something ginger but, I digress.

This year, some more men in blue are coming to Saffaland, only they wear a different shade. We really have a shortage of colour in sports but again, I digress.

IF Dale Steyn is injured before the tests and we have another drawn home series, your red and gold, too bright for it's own good team will have to pay. Chances are you won't reach the semis of the Modi/Majola/Sutherland tournament, but it's okay. You have Cam White, a whole lotta Saffers and of course all those female actresses that Lalit Modi like to stare at. So really, the S&M's love you anyway. What the hell will you do with a trophy? It doesn't last eternally, like love does.

So from here onwards, Dale must not play. He needs to rest for the real tournament. Got it?

Of course you did, you are an engineer after all.

Love,
Me

P.S: Do you really have to wear gold?