"How shit you must be if I got you out twice!"
-Paul Harris to Andrew Symonds, Perth 2008

Wednesday, February 17, 2010

The day AB was born

That would be today, about twenty six years ago. Lovely.

Won't waste time on his numerous talents because barring one, the rest of it means zilch for this birthday.

AB can't sing the Indian bowlers to life-long coma. They have already heard Brett Lee.
He can't stun them with his catwalk because cricket's modelling Queen is their captain.
He can't take lightning-like catches, the Saffers are batting.
He can't beat them in golf, the Indians party when they want to relax. They do not hit the golf course.
He can't even lure them with his looks, America hasn't legalized gay marriage yet.

The only thing he CAN do is bat his team to a draw. Remember batting AB? It's the thing that you were first known for. It's the thing that you have been neglecting as of late, with all these commitments to your other talents. It's now time to go back to it. Lose the rest. On your birthday, give us the gift of a lovely draw.

Meaning, don't get yourself RUN OUT IN A GOD DAMN TEST FOR FUCK'S SAKES!

Bat AB, bat like you have never batted before. Unleash your awesomeness on the Indians. Then you can go back to the modelling/singing/flashy fielding/golfing/whatever else you are good at (I want to save my breath). But for today just bat.

Happy birthday pretty boy.

11 comments:

Rishabh said...

They sent in Prince as a nightwatchman, I assume.

Anonymous said...

gotcha! You are Alex, correct?

Rishabh said...

lol, what?
are you talking about me? if yes, that's a terrible accusation, not to mention baseless!

Mock Wah Steam Wah said...

No Rish, I guess that was shot towards Purnsss.. No Pu(r)n intended! ;)

Mahek said...

That didn't quite pan out the way you wanted. Mishra made him look silly with that googly. Don't know what AB was shaking his head for. 5 more.

Purna said...

Me Alex? Which alex? The guy on CWB or the one who accused me of being an Amy copycat? Either way, I can assure you I am not him.

I want to hit AB. Actually, I want to hit Ashy P...he opened the door with his stupid shot.

Mahek said...

Series loss averted. These Saffas are a pain in the ass.

Purna said...

Mahek, wait till you play England.

Mahek said...

I'm not too worried about them right now, we seem to have done quite well against them in the past decade and a half.

Anonymous said...

To be fair to AB though, he did bat as (if) he had never batted before.

- frau

Purna said...

Frau, I laughed so hard at that.