On India's win: A middle finger creeping up from every corner and getting entangled in Dhoni's hair. Then pulling Dhoni's hair to expose it as a wig.
On Sachin's double century: The cricket fan in me is jubilant but the Saffa fan in me is sulking like there is no tomorrow. Did you have to pelt my Dale to do it? Everybody's singing your praises and I should too, because nobody else deserved it more but next time (because who else will break this record other than Sachin himself?), pick ANOTHER TEAM. Like Australia. Ricky smiles too much these days. I miss his hairy, sulky face.
On AB's century: What the fuck were you celebrating for? Where were all these runs when the team needed you in the second test and the first ODI? Honestly, I don't care what a great innings it was, he looked like he just wanted his century and nothing else. I know the team wasn't able to support him, but FUCK AB, you weren't able to support the team on SO MANY OTHER OCASSIONS! Play for the team fucktard!
On Charl's eye: Brave man. He batted and bowled with his one eye. Very ghoul-like. Brought back so many childhood memories!
Charl, the one eyed King
On Binga's retirement: No more skateboarding tweety in tests. I am actually saddened by this one. I liked Binga because he never gave up. The prime example of a keener. But hey, now he has more time to promote suits and work on a new album! It will be titled "I wasn't picked for Ashes 2009 and we lost".
On Australia's win over the Winides: Yawn.
On Australia's win over the Kiwis: When did Witchy learn to take wickets in T20? This is bad, it's very bad.
On Crashraful's drop: All I can say is, I am finally sleeping peacefully at night. Doesn't that say it all?
On Mashrafe's impending retirement from tests: Hi, National Captain. You have to be a bowler of Bond and Lee's stature to consider this. They loved their test cricket and tried everything in their power to get back to it. They only retired when they realized that AGE was not on their side either. You are TWENTY-FUCKING-SIX. Try harder.
On blogging: Man, I miss this!