"How shit you must be if I got you out twice!"
-Paul Harris to Andrew Symonds, Perth 2008

Thursday, August 20, 2009

The Ashes: Random thoughts

I won't do a full post on the Ashes because England is a joke and Australia is South Africa's arch nemesis. But I will share my random thoughts as I watch the game:

-I am excited about the 5th test...been waiting to watch a good test match since SA vs Aus last summer

-Australia seems to get wickets the minute I watch. Collingwood and Bell both fell soon after I sat in front of the television. Must remember this when Oz plays the Saffas and Bdesh.

-Ian Bell's 50 made me throw up first thing in the morning. Ricky Ponting is responsible for my loss of body fluid so early in the day. Must sue.

-I like Siddle. That dude can bowl. Too bad he is Australian.

-Strauss, Prior, Pietersen and Trott were all born in South Africa. They must be renamed as the South Africa B team. Might earn them more respect.

-Lilly Allen is at the game but Onions has been dropped. The cameraman kept the camera poised on her till she waved upon Warnie and Hussain's incessant begging. Warnie really needs to learn how to keep it in his pants.

-Swann...is...still...in...the...team. This time I died from laughter. Strauss and Flower will be compensating my family for the early loss of their beloved daughter.


Stani Army said...

The whole of the Australian team's ancestors were born in England. Must name them the original English team.

Lilly Allen, what a pointless human.

Swann is in the team because he likes doing interviews and talking a lot, uses twitter and is white. Sadly, Monty is none of these things.

Purna said...

That's true Stani. The stupid Pommies didn't realize that all their convicts were their best cricketers. This is what happens when you get rid of evil people :D.

Monty might be a little more useful than Swann but he is still shitty.