"How shit you must be if I got you out twice!"
-Paul Harris to Andrew Symonds, Perth 2008

Saturday, June 12, 2010

T1D1: Behind the scenes

As it poured like a bitch outside, here's what happened inside. Benn and Gayle got along.

It wasn't easy. Gayle had just lost yet another toss to Graeme Smith and Benn was still pissed from being ejected off the ground in the fourth ODI. There was tension. Gayle put on this shades and pretended to not look at Benn while sizing him up and down. Benn stared blatantly. He didn't need no shades, his powers were in his eyes.

At one point Gayle opened his mouth and said, "We gotta get along meaning you gotta fucking do what I tell you to, and get me wickets".

To which Benn replied, "Remember Brad Haddin? I'll smash you to his height if you fucking ask me to leave the ground again".

Gayle: "You do realize I have a super duper chest?"

Benn: "You do realize I am your key bowler?"

Gayle: "How?"

Benn: "We are playing the Saffers and I am the spinner".

Gayle thought for a moment. Then out of nowhere, he flung himself at Benn and started punching him. Benn was not to be taken down so easily though. He fought back, kicking Gayle face repeatedly with his long legs. It did little to bring Gayle down but Benn didn't give in. Chairs flung everywhere, windows were smashed, it was utter chaos.

(In the dressing room next door the Saffers engaged in a meditation hour lead by Jacques Kallis and Hashim Amla, meaning they were essentially asleep in a yoga pose).

Then the umpires signalled for game time and Benn and Gayle had to stop. No one had won. But they were playing the Saffers and Benn was the spinner. Shane Shillingford was also a spinner but who could trust some player with such an un-West Indian like name. So they shook hands and decided to get along.

Eventually there was some cricket and Shane Shillingford struck, twice. But it didn't matter because Benn too had gotten a wicket, a crucial wicket.

Chris Gayle curved half his face into a smile.

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