"How shit you must be if I got you out twice!"
-Paul Harris to Andrew Symonds, Perth 2008

Wednesday, June 9, 2010

The Dancing Bowler

I have a soft corner for Sreesanth. Everytime, and I mean everytime, I have writer's block or no material to write about, Sreesanth crops up.

For instance, this latest quote on Crapinfo:

" Everybody knows I can dance well and I can bowl fast too. There are only a few bowlers who can do that "
-Sreesanth knows he has a rare combination of talents

How those lovely words found each other and in under what circumstances, I do not know. But I am not a journalist and always happy to make up shit. So here is the real story.

Darling Sreesanth was recently fired from his job as captain of the Kerala cricket team. Further, he was not informed by the Kerala Cricket Association (KCA), but rather heard it from friends. This upset Sree tremendously but KCA is so immune to his tantrums (I am assuming there have been others) that they are not bothered. So Sreesanth is thinking about quitting Kerala, which might mean anything from moving from the state itself to just never playing for their cricket team. Either way, the loss is Kerala's because...everbody knows Sree can dance well and bowl fast too. There are only a few bowlers who can do that.

KCA are so thick-headed and uninsightful that they cannot spot this rare gem of a player. Dancing is such a criticial skill to have when you want you are bowling a bouncer at 150kph. Why else would Darren Gough be the winner of Strictly Come Dancing and Juan Theron put Shilpa Shetty to shame on the IPL dance floors? Rumour has it that even has a police officer, Shane Bond pursued his dancing career and if you dig a little deeper, you are sure to find out that Allan Donald was the first winner of So you think you can Dance.

He probably has the essential skills to be a good captain too, but only Sree knows what they are. Maybe he will reveal it to us through yet another quote right before he actually does leave Kerala:

"Everybody knows I can be emotional and I can be a good captain too. There are only a few cricketer that can do that".
-Sreesanth knows he is a rare combination of every joker in this world. 

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